no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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