i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
