so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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