As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize