a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
