He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
