Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize