normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
