Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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