I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
