i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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