it hurts more in the daytime
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
