Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
