I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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