were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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