p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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