is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
