i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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