Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
