no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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