she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
