so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
