i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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