"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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