Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize