margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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