we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Please don't give away my fajitas
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