so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
