Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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