i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
