I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Operation Purity has been aborted
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
