I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
