I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
