they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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