Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I smell stomach acid.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
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