this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
