just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
