You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
