Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Sorry my hands just texted you
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
