This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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