All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
