Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Text me some of your sweat
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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