very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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