dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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