you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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