i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
