I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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