Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
