oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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