How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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