She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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