I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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